On her husband's death, Queen VIctoria adopted permanent mourning.
According to established mourning practiced by Queen Victoria on the death of her husband, Prince Albert, in 1859, the closer the relative, the longer the prescribed period of mourning. Men maintained an official mourning status for much shorter periods than women. The longest and most elaborate mourning behavior decreed by social mores (pronounced "mor-ays") was for widows. As the U.S. Civil War dragged on, though, and so many soldiers died, in addition to deaths from other causes such as old age and disease, the elaborate mourning customs became relaxed and shortened out of sheer practical necessity.
Deep Mourning
This period traditionally lasted a year and a day from the death date of the loved one. During this time, the widow left her home only to go to church and wore dull black outer clothing over white underwear trimmed in black, no jewelry, black accessories, a black bonnet with a long weeping veil over her face and white lawn cuffs on her dress to absorb her tears if she couldn't find her black hanky. She was never seen socially, paying no calls and receiving no visitors outside her immediate family. In "Gone With the Wind," Atlanta society was deeply shocked when Scarlett Hamilton (n e O'Hara) attended a charity ball and was heartless enough to dance with Rhett Butler in her widow's weeds. If a widow had young children and no means of support, she was grudgingly allowed to remarry at the end of this period.
Full or Second Mourning
This stage was supposed to last at least nine months. The widow was allowed to lift the veil off her face and wear it down the back of her head. She continued to wear black dresses, but could accessorize with pearls, jet jewelry or a brooch fashioned from the hair of the dead loved one. She could pay calls and receive visitors. Many an elderly widow maintained this state for the rest of her life.
Half Mourning
At this point in her journey out of the vale of tears, a widow could lighten her mourning, put off her black dress and start to wear such cheerful colors as gray and various shades of purple. Even a deep burgundy or maroon was acceptable. She could add trimming to her dresses. She could get out her gold jewelry with colored stones again. She could begin to be seen again at social events such as parties and the theater. For the next three to six months, she eased her way gradually back into normal life and normal clothing, which in the South by the end of the war was whatever was left in her closet, no matter the color.
End of Mourning
Her mourning officially completed, a widow was welcomed back into society and could resume normal life. She could also resume normal clothing, which in the South by the end of the war consisted of whatever was left in her closet or her attic, no matter the color.
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